Making small talk dating
Some (and we're generalizing here) introverts don't realize that small talk will actually help them get to the bigger topics. However, sometimes introverts feel that even the short amount of time it takes to get into real conversation is a waste of time. Someone says something like, "John really did a great job on the party this year. " This should be followed up with a quick response (such as "Yes I have" or "No, it's my first time.") But introverts like to chew on their words before saying them aloud.They'll think about that question a bit, and other things will pop into their mind, like "I wonder how they know John," or even "Why would they care if I've been to other parties?They might feel like all these questions are too quick and meaningless, and as a result they'll skip small talk altogether.
But in these very moments where a conversation would enhance an encounter, we often fall short. We go home sweaty and puffy, and eat birthday cake in the shower. Below, a few tips for introverts (and everyone else) on how to turn small talk into big ideas at the next Social Obligation Involving Strangers: One way to get beyond small talk is to ask open-ended questions. Either they'll seem to get bored and not say much or they'll seem to skate over small talk in favor of more in-depth topics.This is especially true if its just you and your introverted pal having a conversation over coffee, for instance.What you need to know in this instance is that the introvert is not being rude (even if they seem a little bored with the small talk you're making) and it's not that they aren't interested in getting to know you.
It's just that in general, introverts don't like small talk. Small talk serves as a gateway toward deeper conversation.Aim for questions that invite people to tell stories, rather than give bland, one-word answers.