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Instead, I carried a torch for a recently divorced man, who couldn’t stick around for more than eight weeks at a time, for more than a year.Each time he returned, he’d tell me how much he missed me and how much I meant to him, and I loved to hear it.If you’ve been living on a steady diet of relationship drama, it’s time for a reality check. Blaming the other person and hoping that they will change isn’t helpful, because you’re the one who’s tolerating these circumstances in your life. Is that kind of relationship possible with the person you’re with (or considering) now? I wanted to know that my significant other was “all in” with me, not halfway out the door.Being willing to accept responsibility for the situation you’re in is the first step to a more fulfilling love life. I came to recognize that I wasn’t choosing men who were willing to have this kind of relationship with me.An unstable relationship may be exciting at first, but it can eventually become draining.A turbulent relationship can sap your energy and your confidence.Surely he was really a good person and truly loved me, but was just “going through something” or “needed space.” Eventually he’d be back with tears, apologies, and flowers.I’d like to say I outgrew this tendency by the age of, well, maybe forty, but the fact is I didn’t.
Instead, I’d hang on for far too long in the hopes that things would get better, which they never did.If you’re involved in a troubled relationship, it can be all-encompassing.It’s also very tempting to adopt the role of the savior because you get to be the “together” person, the responsible one. When I asked myself these questions, I saw that I wanted to be loved and to feel safe.Once you’ve considered these questions for yourself, consider what changes you’ll need to make in order to have the kind of relationship you want.
I came to understand that I’d have to give up the idea that drama was an indicator of true love.I’d spent the past year swiping right, sending winks, flirty texting, and giggling on command—and all I got in return were a few lousy OKCupid stories and a confidence level that can most accurately be described as the polar opposite of Donald Trump’s. This story sounds a bit hokey and right now you’re likely in the middle of rolling your eyes and resisting the urge to check your Bumble notifications, but, on the off chance that you’re reading this because you want to know how I did it, I’m more than happy to tell you.