Dating a perfectionist


03-Feb-2020 02:04

This level of perfectionism can cause a phenomenon known as spectatoring, in which a person feels as though they’re watching themselves have sex, and spends the entire time concerned about their performance.“It can create a level of anxiety and stress,” Kerner told the Cut.Meredith is one of the many men and women whose perfectionism negatively affects their sex lives.

When Meredith* first started having sex her freshman year of college, she was insecure and naive, afraid she’d get dumped if each encounter wasn’t absolutely perfect for her partner.

Those standards include a partner’s expectation of how a woman should look, how often they should be having sex, or what positions they should be trying.

Such partner-prescribed perfectionism was found to increase a woman’s anxiety and negative self-esteem, which can affect their ability to enjoy sex.

She prioritized his pleasure over her own every single time, focusing all her energy on giving a memorable performance that would leave him satisfied, and always wanting more.

“Once that started with the first partner I had, I haven’t been able to stop.

A March study from the University of Kent explored the long-term effects that perfectionism can have on a person’s sex life.



If you missed it the first time, Hannah and Ingrid initially confirmed their relationship last September in DIVA Magazine. Hannah Hart wrote something that was almost identical.… continue reading »


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